Customer service disasters

August has been a busy month for us. Yes, in just one month we have enjoyed all this fun!

• I ordered 3 mobile broadband. I waited at home all day for delivery. Nobody turned up. I rang them and was told I had not supplied enough identification (even though I had filled out their arduous online signup form completely). I could scan and email (or fax) further identification, and then wait at home another whole day for delivery. No thanks.

• Our dishwasher played up. We called Electrolux to come and look. They couldn’t make an appointment time any sooner than two weeks later (two weeks washing dishes, ugh). The service guy got sick so they cancelled the appointment and rebooked for a time an additional two weeks later. We tried another company, Drac Services. They didn’t show up and told my wife she hadn’t been home when she rang to query. Turned out they’d gone to the wrong customer. Booked another time. Finally made it to our house a couple of days later. Five minutes to assess the problem ($70): motor burn out. Said it would be an easy fix, like pick it up and return the next day ($370). Didn’t pick it up until after the weekend. Didn’t return it for another two weeks after we rang to complain (twice). Charged more than $370 when additional GST slipped in there, even though we’d been told it was included in quote — which is their legal obligation. Haven’t paid them yet — hey, it has only been one week!

• Last week, twice the go card readers have flashed red when I ‘touched off’. I interpret this as not working, so I swipe the card again. Both times this has resulted in an extra $5 charge, followed by a call to Translink to get the money credited back to my go card. Which takes 10 working days. Too bloody slow, Translink. I’m still watching my go card account, where is my credit?

• Transferred a mobile phone, still under contract, to my wife. Ticked the boxes to transfer the commitment (new owner continues to pay contract). Billed $112 for “phone payout”. Three phone calls to Virgin Mobile to fix this. Standard answer from call centre staff is “We pass it on to the billing department. Call back in 10 days.” Oh, and of course, “No, you can’t talk to the billing department. We’re not allowed to do that.” On third call, ranted a bit. Threatened TIO and backcharging. Have been told it’s fixed. I am watching activity on my bank account very closely…

• The oyster light was not working in one of our four new ceiling fans. Electrician struggled to install them and recommended using a knife to prise off the glass covers. We couldn’t get the cover off to fix the light ourselves. Went back to Beacon Lighting to complain. Said they’d come check it that week. We called them the following week and they finally came around, and couldn’t remove the light cover without a hammer. Waiting on a replacement oyster light. Have light working with cover removed. Looks ugly.

• Decided to give Telstra a go for wireless broadband. After years of resentment that their landline quality is so poor we get substandard dialup and are blocked from ADSL. Worked out the maths and it is cheaper to bundle with a $20/month phone plan than buy BigPond wireless alone. Went into a Telstra shop yesterday to pick up a $20 plan. Seemed so easy until “We don’t accept 18+ cards as primary identification. We need your passport or birth certificate.” Stunned. Tried online signup for a laugh — where I learned they don’t even accept a birth certificate. It is impossible for me to identify myself adequately to Telstra online. However, I did note Telstra do accept a ‘Shooters License’. Tempting…

• Our washing machine was playing up. Still under (extended) warranty. Rang Horizon (Good Guys) and they can’t find our records. Washing machine broke yesterday — it does not turn on. Washing piling up quickly. You try it with a family of 6 (2 adults, 1 teenager, 3 kiddlies). Can’t call them until Monday. This is going to go well…

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